Recently, my daughter, Son-in-law and 2 year old grandson moved in with us while they are in limbo between selling a house and buying another. It has been a pure joy for me. As I mentioned earlier, Clark is two. Although he is not terrible, he is definitely inquisitive, curious and busy. It seems that the one word he hears a lot these days is “no”. As we were cleaning up from breakfast this morning, I was telling Clark no for the umpteenth time. I heard my daughter sigh heavily. I wanted to reassure her I wasn’t upset with him, I just had to tell him no. She acknowledged that she understood that but added that she feels like all she does right now is say no. “It’s exhausting,” she said. I encouraged her that it is okay, this is the season she is in right now. The season of “no”. She needed to be reminded that it’s not only normal, but it is imperative to embrace this season, be diligent in it, and that as a family, they will all be better off when they are through it.
It just got me thinking that as we go through life, we wander in and out of the “season of no”. It looks different for everyone and certainly comes at different times for each of us. For most, it seems like the one thing we really want: to get out of debt, lose weight, find a mate, get a promotion, always seems out of reach for us, yet we are surrounded by others that are succeeding in that very area. It feels so unfair and often the very first turn we take on this journey in the “season of no”, is the one toward Comparison. The minute we start comparing what others have and what we do not, we begin to spiral downward into the “woe’s me” trap. When self-pity settles in, all we can see is what we don’t have causing us to be sad, jealous and bitter. At that point, we are right where the enemy wants us, distracted and self-absorbed and totally ineffective for the Kingdom of God.
I want to bring some encouragement from the Word today.
Heb 12:11 – No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. NIV
If you are walking through a “season of no”, realize that with God as your guide, you can be assured this journey is to teach you some valuable lessons, and mold your character into who He knows you need to be. Don’t be resistant. Instead take away as much as you possibly can. Thank the Lord that you are not alone in the middle of it and before you know it, you’ll find yourself in a new season.
As Clark’s mom, Kayla doesn’t want to withhold anything from her son. However, she also doesn’t want him to get hurt. That means, right now, a lot of things are a “no”. Until he comprehends the boundaries and walks in obedience, there will be lot more no’s and many tears. As the above scripture states, It can be a hard and painful season but just know, walking in that obedience will bring total peace to your situation.
Clark doesn’t understand right now why it seems like it’s always no, or a hand slap. He gets frustrated. He also is reminded constantly that mom is the boss and things go better for him when he simply obeys.
Let’s take a lesson from Clark. This season may feel very frustrating and not make any sense. Especially when “everyone else” gets to. However, the sooner you realize God is in control, and that He loves you more than anyone else ever could and totally wants the best for you, then you can come to embrace the season, knowing God has a good plan and is trustworthy. Ask yourself the question, if it is a no for now, what can I learn and take away? Finally, hold on because seasons change. You won’t be here forever. Instead of focusing on what you can’t have, and others have gotten. Begin to thank him for loving you enough to train you and perhaps even preserve you from something you want, that may not be right for you right now.